4/11/12

Planning a Home Life

Beginning of one's married life began with the consent granted. It was then that might be lawful or unlawful which otherwise could be haram halal. So God has determined that the consent granted even though only a few words, but it can justify the unlawful and forbidden are halal. At that time there bridegroom, bride, guardians, and witnesses, and conducted consent-granted, sahlah both as man and wife.
Status changed both, originally a casual acquaintance suddenly become a husband, a neighbor came home suddenly become a wife. Parents who had a pair, then added another pair. Therefore, if someone married and he was not ready, and do not understand how to position themselves, then the household will only be the beginning berdatangannya various problems. When a husband does not realize that he was married, and then behave like a man who has not married, would be a problem.
He also got in-laws, and even then should be the part to be realized by a husband. A year, two years if God would allow a child, which means longer growing status as the father. Imagine that carried so much status that science does not know precisely when this status will bring harm. Therefore marriage is not as easy as expected, a marriage that no science means immediately prepared to wade through various treatments.
People who are stressed in their household due to inadequate knowledge with his problems. So also for women who are married, it would be a wife. Of course can not be arbitrary when it became a wife, because there had been a separate bond. Status is also increasing, so the child of law, when to have children so the mother. Thus, God has menyetingnya such a way that husband and wife, both have different roles.
Emancipation can not sue because there is no need for emancipation, which is necessary complementarity. As well as a high-rise buildings, it can stand firmly for the principle of complementarity. There are cement, bricks, sand, wood and other materials and then joining the appropriate position and proportions so kokohlah building.
A household, too, if the husband does not know where, do not know their rights and obligations, as well as the wife does not know the position, the child does not know the position, in-laws did not know the position, it will be like a building that is not set builders materials composition, he would soon collapsed. Likewise, if law is not very clever to keep themselves, eg by intervening directly in the management of household child, the law actually was poking around his own household.
A leader will only be a leader if one is headed. That is, do not feel over-led. Just as the president does not need arrogant to the people, because if there were no people then claim to be president, can be considered a lunatic. Hence, the president do not patronize people because with the people he became president. Not worthy of a leader to feel more of a leader who led for status if there is no led.
For example, she holds a master's graduate abroad while her husband graduated from high school, in terms of leadership of the household still can not be turned around with his wife became the leader of the family. Therefore, for the husband not to lose its obligations as a husband. Husband is the breadwinner, is like a pilot for the aircraft, the skipper of the ship, machinist for the railroad, the driver of public transportation, or a coachman for a gig.
As a leader, a husband must think how to set the ark of households to be able to navigate the winding in a storm surge that could land with all the crew to pull over on the coast of hope, which is heaven. Therefore a man should know how to navigate the science of storms, waves, niches, and whirlpools, so survivors arrived at the shore of hope. Nothing wrong with getting married when we thought about it,'' I already have the ability or not to save the child and the wife in the life of the ship sailed back to shore until he could come home later?
'' Marriage is not just a matter capable of looking for money, although it is also important, but not one of the most important. Husband worked hard toil sweat, but he did not pray, it's hardly a loss. Bear in mind because if you just looking for money, please know that the robber is also the goal was just looking for money, then what's the difference with the robber? Just a different way, but the same ideals.
We make a living was included in the process of controlling the ship. No other food to be halal status sweat, so wear clothes that are lawful status, or that if you buy a book of fortune whose status is also kosher. Be careful, though the bag looks a lot of money, it must be smart to control their use, just do not play dirty.
Just as when fishing the fish in the sea, although the fish seem much, still we must be careful, who knows who comes in shark fishing is that it can chew us, or graceful, but it looks sweet mermaid. When the consent granted, a husband should be committed,'' I should be able to lead the household life while wading episode in the world so that all members of the crew and passengers could have survived until the final goal, which is heaven.
'' In fact, if the other passengers join the ship, consider the maid, niece, or the other, then as leader of his duty as well, which should bring them to the same ultimate goal, which is heaven. Allah said,'' O ye who believe, guard yourselves and your families from hell that fuel is men and stones'' (Surah At-Tahriim: 6). Hopefully we can be the ideal leader, the leader who genuinely want to promote every person they lead. Whoever the person is driven to become more advanced.Wallahu a'lam bish-shawab. KH Abdullah Gymnastiar.

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